Climb Every Mountain

Here's a little nugget of self-awareness I've learnt this year: I'm no mountaineer.

Actually, I already knew that (some of you may remember the Ben Lomond incident) but I thought I couldn't get on the plane without having tried it all. Given it my all. Left no stone unturned. Pushed myself.

So I did. I agreed to climb 2,000m to the Mulange Plateaux. I knew it would be tough physically and it was, but I managed (just). But it was my fear that was the biggest problem. I don't like heights. I hadn't realised how much I don't like heights until I was nearly vomiting with fear having walked across a slippery waterfall 1m from the precipice. I knew my reaction wasn't normal when I looked up and saw my friends happily posing for photos on the other side.

A cajoled me the rest of the way and the views from the top were superb. The rats, the drop toilet and the shower (a room with a bucket) not so lovely. But fabulous evening with pals, sausages and marshmallows.

The way down was worse. I'd been awake half the night worrying about it, listening to the rain and wondering how full the rivers and waterfalls would now be. Very, it turns out. A didn't leave my side and our pal Arjan, who could see the tension in my jaw, was a trooper, walking behind me, grabbing and heaving as necessary.

I spent most of the decent on my bum, sliding and slipping over the rocks. I got back across the waterfall (now a raging torrent, I exaggerate not) very inelegantly clinging to the rocks, shaking my head and being heaved out of the water. A then pointed out that I had ripped my trousers and my backside was 'hingin oot'. I cared not a jot. That's how much I was consumed with getting down in one piece. "Everyone can stare at my grazed bum all they want, so long as I get off this bloody mountain" were, I believe, my exact words.

It was my first real case of one step at a time, don't think about it, mind over matter. People do this for fun at the weekends, it's really not that bad but for me it was a big deal. I see it as this year in miniature, breathing, keeping calm, carrying on, relying on others.

And now I'm back. I can barely walk and still want to cry when I think about it, but I did it. There, done.

F x

Things I Will Not Miss

Are:

• The spiders (naturally)
• The occasional waft of B.O, the smell of the dried fish in the shops and the smell of the cheese plants in the garden
• Taking anti-malaria medication
• Living behind bars
• The driving (awful, truly awful - we've even seen a massive articulated lorry holding on the biting point in reverse on a hill down to a roundabout because it had no breaks - genius but terrifying)
• The pedestrians
• The hut

F x

Things I Will Miss

Are:

• The people
• The sunshine and sun-sets
• The fruit and veg (though am looking forward to proper sized peppers, carrots, onions and potatoes - fiddly wee muddy things are annoying to prepare)
• The free time
• The hut

F x

Further Goodbyes

It is all I'm doing right now and really mixed feelings about the whole thing.

I've grown 'rather fond' of Malawi and our life here and it feels strange to think that in just over a week I'll be back where I belong - wonder if all of this will seem like a dream?

Very excited about being home again (and sure this is the right move). Just hoping we stay healthy and safe over the next 10 days and then this whole thing will have been wholly good.

Fingers crossed
F x

Things I would do to make Malawi better off

Are (in no particular order):

• Make sure people aren't hungry, have clean water and soap;
• Make sure all children are taught to read, write and think critically about things;
• Conduct a massive civic anti-corruption campaign, with the help of the Churches, progressively increase civil servants' pay, criminally prosecute more and more instances of it and heavily publisce all guilty verdicts;
• Import some lions, reduce airfares and do some serious tourism promotion;
• Build good train and road links to ports in Mozambique and Tanzania (the roads in Malawi are actually relatively good);
• Pick one of the regional trade blocks, leave the others and throw a lot of resources at selling stuff to its neighbours;
• Build irrigation systems and put the management of the water and energy companies under some serious performance related pay measures;
• Slash (maybe abolish) agricultural subsidies in the developed countries;
• Use farmer co-operatives to increase agricultural production; and
• Make court judgements enforceable against the state.

Most of which are, to some extent, already underway.

F x

PS - am wondering what the answer to the same question for the UK would be......

Reasons why Malawi is still so poor

Are, I think, (in no particular order):

• Envy, which causes a lot of destruction;
• Corruption, which undermines systems;
• Colonialism, which has either created or accentuated a culture where individuals are discouraged from taking decisions, which causes stagnation and delay;
• Self-interest (of some donors), who are only just beginning to co-ordinate their efforts, rarely stay for more than a few years and frequently make aid conditional on the introduction of systems and ideologies that don't fit here, which wastes a lot of energy and resources;
• Greed (of some in power), which the greedy part of me understands, but which causes some shocking inefficiencies and inequalities;
• Hypocrisy, which means that notions of 'international free trade' are just a joke and it is a constant up-hill struggle for Malawi to sell things and prosper.

F x

Please read this book

'Fearless Fighter' Vera Chirwa's autobiography.

She was the first Malawian woman lawyer (or first in Southern Africa, maybe both), campaigned for independence, campaigned for democracy and, together with her husband, spent may years in jail under Dr. Banda's (the Malawian dictator's) regime.

I don't think I agree with all of her politics but can not recommend this book enough. Particularly for the clear overview it gives of Malawi's political history and for the convincing conclusions she reaches about why Malawi is still so poor.....

F x

Just This Once

I'm going to break my own rule and mention my work: I'm dead chuffed with the report I've just handed to the Judiciary. Team of 4 of us did its strategic review, assessed progress, areas for improvement and drew up a list of things they could do. A says giving people 'to-do lists' is my natural talent. I've enjoyed the past 10 weeks and hope that is true. There is a lot that can be done but things can change.
F x

Giraffes are cool (and the low ride even goes on safari!)

:-)

We Love Norman Carr

Fantastic lodge place at the lake. We went with a bunch of pals for the Easter weekend and were very happy eating, drinking and sleeping.

In particular, see pic of sundowners in the lake - life jacket round your bum and legs like a little seat and happily bob away with a G&T in the lake. Must be the peak of human endeavour - seriously!

Happy, happy days.

F x